Overheard at the enkai

Enkai is a drinking party for coworkers. I will make a real post at some point but this one, um, really highlights the cultural differences I am up against. Or the hardships of Katakana English. Or the fact that I work with crazy people. Or.... something.

***

Math teacher: blah blah blah stuff in Japanese I don't understand and am not really listening to
Young social studies teacher: blah blah blah

(Suddenly, he pulls up his shirt to show the math teacher his rock hard abs. I turn away and make a "WTF JUST HAPPENED" face. Everyone at the table laughs their ass off at me. Also, this entire conversation happened before any alcohol was consumed)


Everyone: Hahaha! We scared Elizabeth-sensei! Hahaha!
SS teacher: Heso!
ALT: Eh?
SS teacher: Heso! Heso! What is this in English?!
ALT: Oh. Belly button.
SS teacher: Eh? Velly botan?
ALT: Belly button. Like this button (pointing to a button on my sweater)
SS teacher: Velly?
ALT: Belly. B. B!!
Math teacher, returning from restroom: sup guys
SS teacher: This is English classroom! We are learning BELLY BUTTON!
Math teacher: Oh, berry! Like strawberry!
ALT: NO! BELLY! This is your belly!
SS teacher: I thought that was.... waist?
ALT: Um, well, yeah, that too, but...
Everyone at table: Very! Velly! Berry button! Belly button? Velly button! Hahahaha! Very button!
PE teacher at the next table: omg what is wrong with you people

(after giving a speech)
JTE: Does anyone have a question for Elizabeth-sensei in English?
(two teachers' hands shoot up)
JTE: Yes, Marumaru-sensei?
Random teacher whose name I don't know and who I have never spoken to before and will probably never speak to again: DO YOU HAVE BOYFRIEND?!
ALT: I have TEN boyfriends!
Random teacher: (pointing to self) Number eleven! Number eleven!
SS teacher: Number twelve!
JTE, trying to save me from the awkward situation: Then, Social Studies-sensei?
SS teacher: Ah, umm, eto ne.... same question!
ALT: fu

(after recieving a plate of sashimi)
SS teacher: This is SHII-RU sashimi!
ALT: WHAT? Seal?!
SS teacher: Yes, yes, SHII-RU!
ALT:  You're joking!
SS teacher: No! Please believe me!
ALT:  Seal? Really? REALLY?
Lunch lady: This is scallop.
ALT:  See, it's not seal! You liar!
SS teacher: Yes it is! Shii... er, she-ru! Shell! Shell sashimi!
ALT:  ......

SS teacher, trashed and having revealed at some point during the night that he studied French at university: Elizabeth sensei, je t'aime!
ALT: Yeah yeah whatever, if you love me so much pour me another drink dammit.
Everyone: EHHHHHH??? WAKANNAI!
ALT: Never mind.
SS teacher: No! Tell me! Talk slowly!
ALT: If you love me so much, pour me another drink.
SS teacher: Eh?
ALT: (miming and speaking extremely slowly) SI TU M'AIME... POUR me (miming pouring)... a DRINK (pushing her half-full beer glass to SS teacher)
SS teacher: ...Ah! Wakatta! (starts to chug beer)
ALT: NO! NO! NO! NO!*
Math teacher (pouring ALT a drink): You idiot.

(waiting at the station)

PE teacher: So, you are staying with friend?
ALT: Yeah.
PE teacher: Male friend?
ALT: Yeah.
PE teacher: Boyfriend?
ALT: Um, no, he's gay.
(about five minutes later, after the conversation has moved on)
PE teacher: So, you are staying with boyfriend?
ALT: You didn't understand gay?
PE teacher: No, I understand! Gay is a man who loves another man!
ALT: Right.
PE teacher: But... but... men are monster!
ALT: Then what about you?
PE teacher: Me? I am gentleman!

*only other ALTs will understand why it took such a tremendous effort of will not to change this line to "OH NO! MY BEER!"

Exploring

I've been horrible about updating my blog, and it's been brought to my attention that half the people I gave the address to think it's broken because there haven't been any updates. Sorry! Today is the first day I've had completely to myself since arriving, I think. All the other ALTs went to the nearby island for a weekend festival. I'm all alone, with all the free time in the world and money in my wallet because I just got paid, and man does it feel goooooood.

First off, some everyday stuff.

This is where I live. I'm the house on the far right, with the car parked in front. The other three belong to other ALTs.

I don't want to post pictures of the inside until I've bought some more furniture and generally made everything look nicer, but I absolutely love the house--it has four rooms (entryway, kitchen, living room and bedroom), traditional Japanese-style, with sliding doors, shoji screens and two tatami rooms. 

This is the view from my front window--a rice field, a mountain and the neighbor's garden.

Some of the things I bought to brighten up the house when I got paid yesterday. I love the bunny glasses--so adorable and retro. And I am SO EXCITED about the little plants from the 100 yen shop. I will water them and love them and give them names. (Suggestions welcome!) The little green vase thing came with the apartment, and the paper Audrey Hepburn vase was a gift from Bri--she made it herself! (Thank you!)

To take advantage of my first free day in a month, I decided to go explore some random forest paths that I had noticed on my drive into town.

Path #1. This wasn't one of the ones I was originally intending to take--it's not really noticeable from the road, but it was right next to where I parked, so I walked down it for about 15 minutes before coming back to explore the others. There wasn't much along the way, but the forest was absolutely beautiful. I'm still really curious about where it eventually leads, so I'll probably be heading back at some point.

Path #2. This one went up the side of the mountain.

A shrine? A shack? I have no idea.

There are 33 somethings this way! But what could they be??? (On a side note, I miss being literate.)

Let's find out...

As I found out when I looked up the kanji on the sign back at home, they were 33 stone statues of Kannon, the goddess of mercy. Apparently the idea of Kannon having 33 forms is a common one in Japan; there are other sets of 33 Kannon statues, even within Joetsu. Definitely the coolest thing I've stumbled upon so far.


After that I took another path that connected to the one I was on. It only ended up leading to a graveyard, but it was a hell of a hike, so after getting some katsu curry I pretty much spent the rest of the day hanging out at home reading and getting some much-needed rest.

AUGH

So I've been in Japan for almost a week and a half, and haven't posted a thing here. I KNOW. Turns out I severely underestimated how overwhelming it would be to, you know, move to another country. Practically every move I made for the first week was carefully coordinated and choreographed by others, and when I had a spare moment to myself you damn well better believe I spent it passed out on my futon. I have about an hour before I have to go to bed tonight and I'd rather spend it watching Orange Days than updating my blog, but here are a bunch of pictures, at least. Since that's all you all really come here for anyway. Right?

View from my hotel room on the first night. This was pretty much how Tokyo made me feel.

AWESOME PEOPLE HAVING AWESOME TIMES

 

SHIBUYA

 

WHAT

This is roughly what EVERYTHING EVER looks like around my place, which results in me getting lost a lot. Joetsu/Takada/Naoetsu is actually a legitimate city, though, which surprised me after some of the descriptions that I've heard.

 

 

Kakizaki Beach, where I ended up roughly 45 minutes after dropping my stuff off at my new apartment. Believe me, I have learned a thing or two about pacing myself since then.

 

AUUUUGHHHHHHHHHH

I just had dinner (pasta with spinach and some funky cheese I found--I promise I'll never again make fun of those people who get all their food imported), at my own table, in my own kitchen. My apartment is absolutely fantastic, but I don't want to post a video until after I'm done cleaning and decorating. It's going a lot faster now after the realization that I can just throw everything in the storage space beneath the house. 

More soon!

Oakland

Didn't take a single picture while I was in San Francisco, doh. But here's one of picturesque Lake Merritt in Oakland, and Merritt Restaurant, where Ryan's family has been going for generations (Ryan's Gung-gung used to take his mom and her siblings to eat there when she was a little girl). Oakland is a lovely city and I will bus fight anyone who says otherwise.

Bergamot Station

I realize I already made a post basically saying I was done with LA, but here's one more for you: on Wednesday, Kelsey and I went to Bergamot Station!

Bergamot Station is an arts center and gallery complex in Santa Monica. It used to be a light rail station (where bergamot flourished, hence the name), then a warehouse complex, and then it was abandoned and the city developed it into what it is now. It has a really cool, industrial vibe. Each gallery is completely independent, so there are all kinds of art--photography, sculpture, painting, landscapes, abstract art, portraits.

(Side note: I generally hate coffee house food but the roast beef sandwich I had at the cafe was REALLY GOOD. Cheap, too!)

It's also dog-friendly... a lot of the galleries even had their own dog.

Sophie here was the sweetest! (I love black pugs!)

She desperately wanted something in Kelsey's purse. We eventually realized it was her gum, haha.

After Bergamot Station we ended up heading to Abbot Kinney, which is a shopping area in Santa Monica. A lot of the stores are in old houses that have been renovated, which is pretty cool, but this store took it to the next level by keeping all the rooms intact. There were aprons and cooking supplies for sale in the kitchen, and this awesome display of sea-related goodies (including lots of mermaids) in the bathroom!

We ended up hanging out pretty late that night, but eventually I had to say my first goodbye :( Kelsey and her family have been such a huge support since I moved to LA. I always have the best adventures with her because she knows where to go--even all the way back when I visited Ryan in LA, I wasn't sure I could live here until I met up with Kelsey and she took me shopping on Melrose. Her mom has had us over for many delicious dinners (and sent us home with leftover frozen dinners she had made for the cast and crew of Bri's film Gut-to-Go, which saved my life several times, especially during interviews).

Also, two tangentially related things (okay, one is actually completely unrelated). Speaking of Gut-to-Go: Ryan and I ended up being quite involved in production, and now it's finished and about to premiere. Bri did a fantastic job and is now reaping the rewards of her hard work: she's worked with some big names, was interviewed and featured on ABC News, has been accepted into several film festivals, and was nominated for the Best Actress award at the AOF Film Festival for her performance! Here's the link to her news page again--maybe it'll be playing at a film festival near you!

On a much less exciting note, I've been copy editing for Hyphen magazine for a little over a year now, but the next issue (on newsstands August 15--look for ukulele player Jake Shimabukuro on the cover) will be my last, and they've decided to feature me on the contributors page! Check it out if you get the chance; my "most memorable Hyphen moment" is pretty lolworthy.